On My Own

Tonight all of the children are with their father. They are spending the night.

This is only the second time since he left that he’s kept them all at the same time (or overnight). Only the second time I’ve been alone.

Am I lonely?

Not really. It’s more of a curious feeling. I wonder if empty nesters feel this way. I know my children are out there, only a phone call away, and they are presumably safe.

It’s more that I miss them. Something fierce.

And I feel sad because my son did not want to go. My husband had to peel him off of me and pick him up to keep him from following me. I walked away and didn’t look back, because…well, I couldn’t.

But I did it. I left.

And I am seeing a movie tonight. And I’m meeting up with my sister for lunch tomorrow. I may even be ready to get that manicure. Not sure yet, we’ll see how I feel tomorrow.

And then they’ll be home.

And life will continue to move forward. Because it does that whether we are ready or not.

I prefer to embrace it and be ready.

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